Guilt vs Indulgence

I seem to feel like I have been left over in a race, as I ponder over feelings of guilt. Guilt, You may ask why? Guilt because I gave indulgence priority over some basic must-do. Once there is a respite in a B school from classes and case studies for a day or 2, I seem to madly look for peace(by closing my eyes and sleeping) and indulgence.

Here's my crime record for my indulgence last week

Immideately after my Subject FMCG marketing was over... went over to a quiet classroom and laid myself flat with my music player on. Then booked a ticket at INOX for the night show of Dus Kahaniyan. Spent the evening-night at CITICENTRE hogging a double cheese pizza and Bhelpuri, while my comrades in crime belched away at the prospects of eating Non-Veg. Spent some outh watering moments at Inox before ordering butter pop corn.

The Next day, I borrowed some movies from my assamese friend, and watched Caligula, Mouna Ragam and Agni Nakshatram on my Home Theatre system. Admired the Chennai of the early 80's in those 2 tamil movies. The next day, I made some time for a morning trip to Raja Muthiah hall and went for an AVMAX expo on Home Theatre systems. I thought of buying another set of home theatre system with a digital projection tv in a few months. Thats the effect of getting a little over a million Pre Placement Offer :-)

The tiring journey in the Chennai hot sun, made me retire for a few moments into Landmark in Spencers, and my eyes fell on a few "dirt cheap" movies for 69. I ended up buying "Lakshya", "Yuva" and" Passion of the Christ", and burnt a big hole in my purse. It was so tiring that I spent the rest of the day sleeping without any worry about the impending manic monday that was to strike at 3 am on Monday when I got up frustrated after a few repeated mosquito attacks. The prospect of having underestimated my priorities, for the few endless moments of indulgence made me feel guilty, and to add insult to injury, I get chided by parents on how "careless" I am, and a spectator during the India Pak match puts a banner which says " CRICKET FIRST, MBA LATER" and my mother stares at me, as I look at the screen, knowing fully well that there are no directions to hide the face.

But after all the indulgence somewhere down I was still feeling happy that I had watched Dus Kahaniyan. Its a great movie where 10 small movies have been made into 1 movie, with a little over 10 minutes for each small movie. Excellent direction, kept me hooked on.

With about 50 days left for placement and 4 months for the course to end, I am realising the seriousness of arming yourself with enough knowledge to use jargons for a living. Only thing that I am sure of, is not to get into any IT company(the service companies). So as I dwell in guilt, its time to get back to normal life, 3 hour snoozing sessions, classes, presentations, B plans and et all, and when all of that gets freezed for a few moments the glorious cycle of indulgence and guilt will repeat......but a similar blogpost will not :-) .

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