kartik kannan's space on the web

MID NIGHT MASALA and the power of 12


The time was 12 minutes past 12 , the 14th of june ...yes ...this very morning ...when the day had just come alive in the form of darkness and my mind seemed to have an air of comfort ....as I emerged from a decrepit theatre(Velan theatre,Nanganallur ) after watching a tamil movie ...a night show ...for which only 30% turnout was there given the fact that I was on seat no 12 in the balcony,last in the balcony .The theatre where I watched the movie....people seemed to have come just to while away the time...and catch a glimpse of one of nature's gifts to mankind on screen.I had come there with 4 of my friends and had decided on this near dilapitated theatre as it was the only theatre in the vicinity (5-6 km's ) of my humble surrounding's that had "that specific" movie running. While I glanced a furtive look at the guy at the entrance who collected the parking coupon's he too looked at me with a certain nonchalance ...so as to say "po da po ...innikku unakku sivarathiri thaan " . Why one may ask ?

I got to know why exactly 12 minutes after 12 minutes past 12 (a.k.a 00: 24 Am IST).As I was recollecting some of the sublime moments of the movie,I was drawing a parallel with my life...and picturing myself in that movie....when all of a sudden my dreams on bike were interrupted with some blazing torchlights ...in the road that joins Nanganallur to Madipakkam...and behind the torclights were some hefty men ...with a paunch line to boast...(pregnant ladies beware ...these guys can beat u hands down when it comes to size of the belly )....

When one stares at such figures ...especially when the belly is in such a rotunda...it takes a second to realize that it is ...our very own singara chennai police...,...but hey without the khaki uniform !! The men were in white's ...as white as Ariel white or Super 501 white....but who's bothered about that ......? These guys , viciously pointed out the light towards my eyes and looked through me as i was a convict trying to find my escape route ....

police : "VANDIYA NIPPATTU"

Me: yen sir , yenna matter ...yethanu prachanai a?

police: yengaenthu varinga , intha UNTIME'la unakku iieenna pa velae(looking at me as if I was returning from a brothel)

me: sir , Padam pathutu varom,night show !!

police: Night show'nnu yenakku theriyadha ? yenna padam

Me: Ullam kekuthe .....

Police: (looking at me with a skeptical eye now as if i was watching a "blue film" ) ticket keetha ?

Me: pointing to my friends....with a blank expression....machan dei...irukka

Thankfully a visibly responsible friend of mine showed him the tickets in a very respectful manner...and the police guy was about to leave us..when another "brainy" police guy ..intervened asking us to show our identity,licence and RC book.My friend gleefully showed his book and was letoff almost immediately ....I , very hesitatingly took out my Id Card(office) and My Licence....and pretended to search for my RC book in my bike.. (I have never seen my RC book for my bike ...as it lies misplaced in some damn corner of the house) and still continued searching ....(the silencer being the only place where I didnt search !!!)

Police: Kaami Pa ...Na wuun RC book'a parkanum

me :(within my mind): yennakkum thaan athaa parkanum aasae.....

As i feigned saying that the book was not there...he asked me to go home ..and get it ..else forgo the bike.....Just to add more "masala" in the midnight,I forgot my Vehicle number ...saying my kinetic honda number instead of my Bike's number and that was a "windfall" of a reason for him to pluck the keys of my bike ......Boy !!!! ...what tension and masala could do to a guy who could say what is 76 x 45 is under 10 seconds....but alas...my memory deserted me in this very crucial moment.

I was waiting ..with my eyes constantly transfixed on the policemen...knowing that ....there would be the "point of return" after which the policman would condescend and get down to business... by asking us to bribe them ...They started the bid at 1500 ....but having known them well over ...so many years...thanks to 4 such previous incidents ....(No RC book ), I lessened it down to what was there in my pocket...30+ 50 bucks....70 rupees too much ....but I just wanted to get back home .......and soon the guy..gleefully accepted my hard earned 80 bucks ..walking into the moonlight..before parting with an important piece of info that there were three such patrol teams lurking in the midnight....across this area of 5-6 kilometres...and I was asked to to avoid the main road ...to lessen the burning of a hole in my purse . As I glanced my watch the time was 12 36 (12 minutes past the 24 past 12)...and this ordeal had lasted exactly 12 minutes.


Now what !!! HOME....I was totally confused ...where I was and somehow braved my way through some mud roads fit for moto cross champoinships , followed a slush all along so that I dont hit the mainroad and catch another "vasool raja" and after an ardous biking @50 km's an hour in pitch darkness through some longish route , I returned home 12 minutes past 1 ...to live another day ...bike another day and finally to catch 12 winks of sleep KYUNKI ....ullam kekuthe more !!!!

PS:

1) If U ARE POLICEMAN READING THIS BLOG....HEY I JUST GOT MY RC BOOK !!!!!

2) ULLAM KEKUTHE : the movie that I watched ....simply rocks...reminded me of my good-ol college days...(more so the day's I wasnt in college :-) )